April

I was reading a blog today (check it out here) about a mom who is pregnant with a little girl, April Rose. She has been told that her daughter is not going to live, because of many different diagnoses. The doctors tried to get her to terminate early on, which she was adamantly opposed to, and now she is facing the choice whether to induce a little bit early (she is 34 weeks) so she might possibly have time with her daughter while she is alive. This mom is such an amazing woman--she is so raw and honest about her deepest feelings, and so truthful about her walk with God.

She said today, that if she was honest with herself, most of her life she was only a part-time Christian, only relying on God when she felt a need. Outwardly, she lived as a Christian, but didn't feel like she ever really needed God. Her life was untested, for the most part, and pretty easy.

I can't tell you how much I can relate to her feelings. So many times through my relatively easy life, I turned to God when I needed him, really truly loved Him, but didn't always depend on him--through the good times and the bad. This past year has changed my life...like April's mom said, I've never depended on God like I do now. I never would have dreamed that I could say I was thankful for the events that have happened in my life--but I am. Jonathan's short life has changed me, changed my relationship with Him, deepened my friendships with others, and made me know that my Father will carry me through each and every moment of my life--good or bad. Like she said in her blog, I don't want to be a part-time daughter, but a full-time daughter of my full-time Father!

Her last line said this...

"But I have surrendered. I am His. I know I will somehow be okay, because whatever happens is His design for our lives, and the pain, whether temporary or life-long is part of the process necessary to make me the daughter that I am to become."

God has a plan through it all--and wants nothing more than for us to turn to Him, trust Him, and depend on Him for our very breath.

Two verses today--I just couldn't pick one...

Psalm 39: 7

"And so, Lord, where do I put my hope? My only hope is in you."

Psalm 138:8

"The Lord will work out his plans for my life--for your faithful love, O Lord, endures forever..."

What a wonderful promise! What else is there to do but trust in Him??

Would you pray for little April and her mom with me?